It’s the New Year – a time for reflection. For some of us, it’s a time for making resolutions.
I’m focusing on allowing more ease in my life in the coming year (and forever!).
It seems like a rather straightforward intention. I’m sure having things easier sounds like a good idea to lots of us.
So I started taking a deeper look into this. Recently, for instance, I was feeling much more ease and happiness in my life. And then I seemed to sabotage it, and things became difficult again. I wasn’t sure why, until I tripped upon something that seemed to answer my question. (I seem to do a lot of tripping upon things these days).
I realized a part of me was still not approving of having it easy.
Well, duh. Like most of us, I was raised with the American work ethic as the thing that determined my worth. Work hard and have a monument built to celebrate your struggle.
Over the years, however, I’ve come to see its limitations. When we think our worth is based on hard work and struggle, we attract just that – a lot of hard work and struggle.
When we are simply worthy, we attract what’s appropriate to our lives. Sometimes that might appear in the form of hard work. And other times, it might show up as a stretch of ease for as far as the eye can see. But either way, we are worthy.
That last piece was what I tripped over. Intellectually, I realized the truth of my worth – even in accepting ease. But energetically, I realized I was still not altogether approving of having an easy life. That somehow it was just wrong.
How can I have an easy life when others do not?
How can I be okay with myself if I really let go of struggle?
What kind of person does it make me if I release the need for all that hard stuff and allow what I want?
I think I would be the kind of person who loved and accepted herself as she is and didn’t have to keep jumping through hoops and inviting hardship so that others would approve of her.
Or maybe I would just be someone who actually approved of herself.
That’s the gem here – self-approval. Because this self-approval thing is important. Really important. I’ve begun to see that whatever I approve of in my life grows. If what I want is not in my life, there’s a good chance, on some level, I haven’t been approving of it.
My non-approving self was not approving of ease, so like a plant starved of water, ease had been unable to grow.
So I ask – are there things in your life that need some self-approval? If there’s something you really want but it’s missing from your experience, identify it and ask yourself – do I truly approve of this thing that I desire?
If you have a moment of hesitation, or if an uncomfortable feeling wells up, you might be dealing with a case of self-disapproval.
If so – take a breath. Let it go. Let it change. Because it really is up to you.
Happy New Year. I wish for all of us a year where we allow all the good and ease in our lives lots of room and love to grow.